Whether you have been with your significant other for a year or 10 years before marriage, it is easy to get caught up in the excitement of wedding planning and the first year or two of marriage. No matter how “perfect” a relationship or marriage may seem at first, they all take continual work and respect from each partner.
The following are a few helpful tips to keep in mind as you find yourself slowly fading out of the honeymoon phase of your new marriage:
- Your partner’s little quirks that you either found cute and endearing or only slightly irritating aren’t going to disappear now that you’re married. Quite frankly, you may find that they become more annoying as time goes on. You need to accept them for what they are and see past them. If they are things you can’t see yourself getting past, you will need to clearly communicate the issues with your partner.
- Time away from one another is okay. In fact, it can be beneficial to your marriage. It can be great to spend all of your extra time with your spouse, however, you should still have your own life as well. Be sure to make time to catch up with friends or do things that you have a passion for that your spouse may not be as enthusiastic about.
- Always listen. If your spouse has something to say that is important to them, just listen. That is what marriage is about. Don’t walk away, tell them to be quiet, roll your eyes, or sigh just because you don’t find a subject to be important.
- If you have children, do not put them before your marriage. That may come as a shock to this generation of parents who tend to stop everything for their children, but before the children were born it was just the two of you. The marriage itself needs to work in order for the both of you to be good parents. It is beneficial to the children to see their parents in a loving, supportive marriage.
- Find a way to keep the passion alive. Passion is what drives us and gives us those butterflies when we first meet someone. Over time, it is common for those exciting feelings to fizzle out. You may have to dig deep and get creative to find new ways to ignite that spark again, but it will certainly be worth it. Everyone loves that feeling of being desired and the excitement of doing new things with someone.
Marriage certainly isn’t easy, but if the love is there and you want to make it work, you need to find a way to keep both partners happy. If you find that you are having difficulty working things out on your own, it can be beneficial to see a marriage therapist to talk through some underlying issues.